18 May 2012

Today

...today I am thinking of you. I didn't intend on making my way here today, but I find myself at the over look where you first showed me on one of our first dates and the same place where you held me, kissed me, and said goodbye before I missed my flight to the south land. I thought that would be the last time I saw you but life had different plans. Somehow it wasn't meant for me to leave then.. And as we would learn, neither was it your time to go back east. The days that followed only further enlivened my love for you. A love neither of us would acknowledge until it was too late. I never dreamed of sharing a connection with you like I did. And I still can't explain it other than to say God uses all things in our lives to show us our true selves, our real desires, and all of that which pales in comparison.

 It's calm here today. No white caps on the water and even the prairie grass stands still. We both know that's not usual. But, with each new day we are blessed to live, normal is redefined. So it is with our lives. There is someone new in my picture. He is smart and kind and thoughtful. He has a plan and is a faithful man. And you, your old normal has become new again. I am happy for you and proud of you. Be the man I know you are deep down. Don't forgot what I told you again and again.. You've been given the Good Life, now do what you need to do to live it.

Today I'll pray for you. Maybe the Lord will nudge your memory of me if just for a moment. Just to know that I send you my love. We both know that we could never have been, but still an unlikely love flourished. And I am grateful... Pain, sorrow, happiness and joy alike. You taught me so much.. Namely, that I can be loved. And to that I can say no more than Thank You. Today.. I am thinking of you... And that is enough.

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